五月的故事

又一个月了。。我又在公司做了一个月的废材。。天天在公司做无聊的事情。。回想自己在今年的改变。。我变得不积极了，爱逃避事务，害怕尝试新事件，浪费时间，不满足。。
是我将不开心的事件往心里面埋而导致我的潜意识令我改变吗？
我想是时候看医生了。。我真的很不满意现在的我。。
人不停重复的做着自己不喜欢的事情，会有心理病吗？
最近的我总是忘记这个忘记那个。。是不足够的睡眠吗？

说开心的事，我又老了一岁。。天啊！时间过得真快。一年前的愿望是跟现在很不一样。。
以前总是想出国旅行，可是现在很想有一个属于我跟他的安乐窝。。但想起他言行，好像和我愿望还有一大段的距离。。

四月的心情。。。

最近很多朋友生日。。花了一部份的钱为朋友庆生。。。

Whisky 已经离开我两个星期了。。。开始又想念她。。。前几天才知道为什么我家不能养宠物。。。真的不能接受那个事实。。。是我迷信？？还是真的有此事？？不过这也让我的人生增添了色彩。。虽然那是灰色的事件。。。

突然很想有自己的安乐窝。。跟他一起都有一段日子了。。不想再过着一样的相处方式。。
可是$$$$$....haiz....

昨天接到一个好消息， 亚航终于都飞台北了。。真的很开心。。想了两年终于可以很容易去到台北了。。也不需要那么多钱。。爽~~~~

Goodbye to Whisky

whisky leave me and back to heaven...
why?? why same problem happened again? why god make this thing happen on me again.
should i believe in fate? wordless to describe my feeling..i hope she will alive and by my side.
i cant accept the fact. i not dare to sleep my room when i m alone. when i back to room and look at her stuff and my heart will pain...and tears will drop down..
if i am not the owner of whisky will her be healthy?

狗狗

我要买狗了。。可是我很害怕。。这种的怕是每有字眼可以形容的。。
我害怕再面对一次的生离死别。。那次的记忆是永远永远都不会被忘记的。。
尤其是面对它挣扎和死神搏斗时，而我却无能为力为它做任何事，只能眼睁睁的看着它呼吸一天比一天的弱即慢慢的离开我。。
这次我要买的不再是贵宾狗，而是西施。。
希望我能够看着她健康的长大啦。。。

姐姐

今天在facebook遇到一个很久很久的朋友。
她一个很特别的朋友。她是我爸公司以前的旧伙伴。
虽然她大我十二年， 可是她是我爸公司里的最好谈的伙伴，可能她是很天真的性格。
遇到她让我有很深的感触。。令我想起她在我爸上班最后一天所对我说的话。
我知道她是很不开心的离开我爸的公司。。她说她还有的选择别的老板，可是我却没有的选择。。当时的我还在念中学，当然不认同她说的话也不太明白她要表达的意义。

两年前当我刚在爸的公司上班时，也跟一位女同事有着很好的关系，虽然她也大我十一年，可是我们可以一起抽烟和谈男人经。。哈哈。。可是很快的她也辞职了。。她也跟我说了一番话。。她跟我说‘你慢慢熬’当时我也刚加入我爸公司不久，也领悟不到当中的意思。。可是现在的我真的深受感受。。

我常都会很怀念以前跟她们相处的日子。觉得她们很想我姐姐。。可能是我没有姐姐的关系吧。。

Shooting Day~

Last sunday went to Ethan house and do shooting with yee tien..Snap few funny pic when ethan doing shooting for yee tien.

Our couple Picture

This is my model for my camera..he is Making up to prepare shooting

Putting Mascara...

Finally his make up is done~ Ben : Am I pretty?


Am I look like a flower gal from heaven?

One of my picture from Ethan.

Thanks for this picture and like it very much

Dad Birthday Celebration

Yesterday was my dad birthday and mum plan to have a birthday dinner with dad.
So i choice concord hotel to have our buffet dinner.
Brother was outstation, so only daughters and daughters's bf or husband to celebrate.

Notty Ben!!

Bf/Husband with the birthday man

Ladiesssssss~~

My piggy face

3 sister

Blacky alice

My New Name

I changed my name
My new name is JILLIAN TAN
sound funny.. Even chinese name had to change too.
I got 2 new chinese name..still considering to use which name.
before my chinese name is 郑紫韵 and now have to change my name to 郑姿妘 or 郑恣伝
but i prefer the 2nd name.

History

Today too boring...view some old photo, miss the moments that past and realize i'm very old now..selected few picture.

When I was 14th..lost contact with all the friends

When I was 16th..My best buddy..her face look so childish..hahaha

When I was 17th..my face look like bread

The dating moment of me and Ben~ That time we did alot crazy things

Last year of my Secondary school life. One of the classmate already get married and be a mother.

After graduated from Secondary School and get study at ELS to improve my english language. The classmates look older than our lecturer.

Our 1st Studio Picture. Look very old fashion. Ben look like Girl..Swt

I perm a lawyer hairstyle. The most bad hairstyle

My 1st freelance job with Vicki. As a Nokia Promoter standing whole day just get RM110 perday. Damn Tired

My second freelance job, Osim create a chance to let me meet with Sophia.

We worked together for few job. I knew winnie because of the fancy costume job.

Year 2007, I was busy for my Freelance job and I was enjoying for the jobs.

I was crazy for clubbing when i was 20 and 21th.Non-stop clubbing on every weekend.

I broke up with ben at year 2007 and i get 2 best buddies at that time. Three of us were single and We club together, laugh together, crazy together.

I Was quit for freelance job on 2008. Alice always by my side after i broke with ben. She look like my bro, right?

In 2008, I was busying for friend's birthday celebration. Altot had spend alot $$ but i m enjoying for this happy events.